Me Enganei Com Minha Noiva
Quando sortero eu vivia
Era o maió aperrei
Devido eu ser muito fei
As mulher num mi quiria
Quando prum forró eu ia
Cum quarqué amigo meu
Eles confiava n'eu
Ia bebê e dançá
No fim da festa arengá
E quem ia preso era eu
E para arranjar namoro
Eu toda vida fui mole
Cantei samba, puxei fole
Usei um cabelo louro
A boca cheia de ouro
Chega briava de dia
Quando prum forró eu ia
Cherava feito uma rosa
Mas quando eu caçava prosa
As moça não me queria
Eu dizia é catimbó
Qui alguém butou e não sai
Que mãe casou cum papai
Vovô casou cum vovó
Inté meu mano Chicó
Muito mais fei do que eu
Namorou, casou, viveu
Cum duas muié, inté
Só eu num acho muié
Que queira se esfregar neu?
Mas Deus do céu descuidô-se
Jesus também se esqueceu
E vicença me apareceu
Cuns zoião de bico doce
Nosso amor se misturô-se
Que nem feijão cum arroz
Se abufelemo nois dois
Num amô tão violento
Que marquemo o casamento
Prá quatro dia dispois
No dia de me amarrá
Se arrumou eu e ela
Dei de garra na mão dela
Fui pra igreja casá
Cheguei nos pés do altar
Recebi a santa bença
Jurei num tê desavença
Entre mim e minha esposa
O padre dixe umas coisa
Eu eu fui vivê mais vicença
Cheguei em casa mais ela
Fui logo mi agazaiando
Que mermo eu ia pensando
De dormir com uma costela
Vicença fez uma novela
Pru dentro da camarinha
Quebrou uns troço que tinha
Me ameaçou na bala
Findou drumindo na sala
E eu fui drumi na cunzinha
Da vida eu perdi o gosto
Porque vicença fez isso
De manhã fui pro sirviço
Mas pra morrê de disgosto
Cheguei im casa o sol posto
Vicença me arrecebeu
Inté um café freveu
Botou pra nós dois ceá
Mas quando foi se deitá
Nem sequer oiou pra eu
Da vida eu perdi a crença
De nome chamei uns trinta
Botei a faca na cinta
Fui cunversá com vicença
Vicença deu a doença
Quando eu falei im amô
E preguntô - o sinhô
Pensa qui eu sou o quê
Só me casei cum você
Pra lhe fazê um favor
Bati cum ela no chão
Puxei a lapa de faca
Cortei-lhe o cós da casaca
E o elastro do calção
Vicença tinha razão
De num querê bem a eu
Num era cum nojo deu
E nem pruquê fosse séra
Sabe vicença quem era?
Era macho qui nem eu
Eu muito me arrependi
Porque me casei cum ela
Falei logo cum o pai dela
E de manhã devorvi
Grande desgosto senti
Que quage murria, inté
Home em traje de muié
Tem munto de mundo afora
Só caso com ôta agora
Sabendo logo quem é
I Was Fooled by My Fiancée
When I was single, I lived
It was the biggest hassle
Because I was so ugly
The girls didn't want me
When I went to a dance
With any of my friends
They trusted me
I’d drink and dance
At the end of the party, I’d argue
And I’d be the one getting arrested
And to find a girlfriend
I’ve always been a wuss
I sang samba, played the accordion
Had my hair dyed blonde
With a mouth full of gold
I shined bright during the day
When I went to a dance
I smelled like a rose
But when I tried to chat
The girls didn’t want me
I said it’s a hex
That someone put on me and it won’t lift
That my mom married my dad
And my grandpa married my grandma
Even my brother Chicó
Much uglier than me
Dated, married, lived
With two women, even
I just can’t find a girl
Who wants to get close to me?
But God in heaven, forgot
Jesus also lost track
And Vicença showed up
With big eyes and a sweet smile
Our love mixed together
Like beans and rice
We fell for each other
With such a violent love
That we set the wedding date
For four days later
On the day I was to tie the knot
I got ready, so did she
I took her hand
Went to the church to marry
I reached the altar
Received the holy blessing
Swore to have no quarrels
Between me and my wife
The priest said some things
And I went to live with Vicença
I got home, but she
I quickly started to settle in
Because I was thinking
About sleeping with a woman
Vicença put on a show
In the little room
Broke some stuff we had
Threatened me with a gun
Ended up sleeping in the living room
And I went to sleep in the kitchen
I lost my taste for life
Because Vicença did this
In the morning, I went to work
But I was dying of sorrow
I got home after sunset
Vicença welcomed me
Even brewed some coffee
Set it for us to eat
But when she went to lie down
She didn’t even look at me
I lost my faith in life
Called about thirty names
Put a knife in my belt
Went to talk to Vicença
Vicença gave me the sickness
When I said I loved her
And she asked - who do you think I am?
I only married you
To do you a favor
I slammed her to the ground
Pulled out the knife
Cut the waistband of her dress
And the elastic of her shorts
Vicença was right
For not wanting me
It wasn’t out of disgust
Or for any other reason
Does Vicença know who I was?
I was a man just like her
I regretted it a lot
Because I married her
I spoke right away with her dad
And in the morning, I divorced
I felt great sorrow
That almost killed me, even
A man dressed as a woman
There are many out there
I’ll only marry another now
Knowing right away who they are.