I am a bastard and my name is Bill
I wake up at 7 o'clock and call in sick but I'm scared to talk
I hate to see you look so sad, but please don't make me feel so bad

Because, I am a bastard and my name is Bill

I'd like to say I wanna die
But when I tell you I start to cry
I am a monkey who's name won't stick
But I won't charge you for this trick
Yeah, I won't charge you for this trick
I won't charge you for this trick
I won't charge you for this trick
Yeah I won't charge you for this trick