Forever Night

This is not existence.
It was never meant to be.
Rehabilitation by domination.
Humility.
Depravity.
Cuts made to remove physical beauty.
Forever reminders of what I have become.

Infinite as memories, until forgotten.
Not cured of this pain,
Just removed from its presence.
Hope hollowed out.
Filled in with negativity.
Laid to rest within this concrete womb.
Feeding me lies and false hopes.
Numbered and cataloged
Within this mother I abhor.
Nurtured with the waste of this world.

Rotting alive.
Forever night.

Forced christ
Forcing
worthless life.
Failing me
like humanity failed you.

Martyred for the ease of affection.
Helplessly abused by the words of change.
There is nothing we can do to heal this wound
Terminally nurtured from birth.

Shedding this christian skin
To be reborn in blackest sin!

Steeple laid to waste
Like the moments leading me here.
Bell tarnished in the charred remains.
Patina takes its toll.
Everything is elemental loss.
Hanging like the fool on the cross.
Wound with twine of death.
Eternity begins with a single step.
This is the first of the last.
This moment bound forever.
What's cursed must die.

And it's only getting worse.
I beg for your forgiveness.
I wish you knew
The hell inside my head.
Every dream I've ever had has died
But soon enough I’ll get it right.
On my terms
In my own light.
Energy returns to the universe.
Forever night.