Maplewood

There's no time for things that I perceive as bringing out the worst in me
It's hard enough to get up off the ground
When I'm holding onto useless thoughts
A fight I wish I never fought

And now my back's against the wall
At least there's nowhere left to fall
Count the time it took to fix my lack of trust
I do all I can, but still it's not enough
Now I'm holding out to shed this ball and chain
I tried, but I'm still dragging dead weight

I'm lusting for the little things I love
I never learned of any self-control
'Cause I just couldn't bring myself to care
So many years I wasn't there
Now I'm living with no time to spare
My patterned overthinking isn't scarce
'Cause I just couldn't bring myself to care
Myself to care

And now my back's against the wall
At least there's nowhere left to fall
Count the time it took to fix my lack of trust
I do all I can, but still it's not enough
Now I'm holding out to shed this ball and chain
I tried, but I'm still dragging dead weight