Bloom

I aged by days on afternoons behind those shades
In a darkened room my body lay, tumours blooming in my brain
I am consumed by an unfulfilling sadness, not even misery loves me
I am alone, and I’m afraid I always will be

My mother knows that I am sick
But I hate that she can’t understand
That whilst I am grateful for her love
It won’t stop the shaking of my hands
I can’t apologise enough; I live a life devoid of love

And I always thought I could escape this
Like silence would help me to sleep
I found no bliss in my ignorance
I found no love where you said it would be

No heaven without hell beneath
No misery before you and me
Too busy pulling out my teeth
To bite the hand that made me weak

I sleep with discontent, sorrow creeps around my neck
And I fear that I may choke to death
Your name still hangs in every note
And I’ve tried to fumigate my throat
Just as together as we are alone

No heaven without hell beneath
No misery before you and me
Too busy pulling out my teeth
To bite the hand that made me weak