Rum By Gum

Well, they found him by the gutter,
So they called it sewer-side.
Away, away with rum, by gum, rum, by gum, rum, by gum.
Away, away with rum, by gum, the song of the temperance union.

We're coming, we're coming, our brave little band
On the right side of temperance we do take our stand.
We don't use tobacco because we do think...
That the people who use it are likely to drink.

We never eat cookies because they have yeast.
And one little bite turns a man to a beast.
Can you imagine a sadder disgrace...
Then of a man in the gutter with crumbs on his face.

Away, away with rum, by gum.
We never eat fruitcake because it has rum.
And one little bite turns a man to a bum.
Can you imagine a sorrier sight...
Than a man eating fruitcake until he gets tight.