Eggplant Emoji

Why did my jeans
Come with holes already in the knees?
I recently threw away a pair that looked just like these

He sent me an eggplant emoji
I sent him back a peach
Now we're married with two kids
And a second home in Venice Beach

Hey Siri
How do I know if my cat loves me?
Hey Siri
What's wrong with me?
Hey Siri
What is Aleppo?
Hey Siri
What's wrong with me?

What do you mean
What's the first CD I ever bought?
That's a trendy but difficult security question
Social Media marketing
Is a real degree
She yells at grandma over her cousins
On Christmas Eve

Hey Siri
Are donuts vegan?
Hey Siri
What's wrong with me?
Hey Siri
Why won't my sister call me back?
Hey Siri
What's wrong with me?

I forgot how to work a VCR
I forgot how to pay attention
I forgot how to grow up
It's all in some dusty corner of my mind
Without an iCloud backup, oh

Hey Siri
How do you tie a noose?
Hey Siri
What's wrong with me?
Hey Siri
What does Prozac do?
Hey Siri
What's wrong with me?

Hey Siri, what's wrong with me?
Hey Siri, what's wrong with me?
Hey Siri, what's wrong with me?
Hey Siri, what's wrong with me?