Suicidal Outburst

I honestly don't know what is happening to me
Just memories of what happened
And enough to take me to my limit
The use of haldol and zyprexa
No longer helps to numb the days, after days

Drinking and smoke no longer helps to solve mental problems
Life is the poison that kills me little by little each day
I feel like I should pop my head with an iron rod
Or just cut my throat using a knife