Stutter Rap

Bedtime boys!
Oh mom!

Now hey there people, won't you lend an ear?
'cause I've a story to tell and I'm telling it here
I was born in a town in the great UK
From a baby to a boy to a man today
And I'm a musical man, and I'm a man of verse
But I've got a little problem and it's getting worse

Well my life was so well planned
Survivin' and a-jivin' in a f-f-funk band
'cause rappin', it's my, bread and butter
But it's hard to rap when you're born with a st-st-st, st, st-st, st, st-t, st-t, stutter!

Well no-one's ever seen what I mean
From the age of n-n-n-n-n-n-thirteen
We've all been caught in a m-m-mouth trap
So join with us and do the st-st-st-st-st-st-st-stutter rap

Well it was '82 when I joined the boys
And I was hip, and I was cool, but now I've lost my poise
The kids, our fans, are starting to doubt
When you open your mouth and nothing comes out

And it breaks my heart that we're not on the chart
'cause the record's nearly over when the vocals start
And I'm down and out, and I'm down on my luck
And I'm livin' on my own and I'm dying for a fr-riend to say "You're great!" But I'm under the hammer
'cause all I seem to do is s-s-s-st-

Come on man!
S-s-s-st-stammer!

Well no-one's ever seen what I mean
From the age of n-n-n-n-n-n-thirteen
We've all been caught in a m-m-mouth trap
So join with us and do the st-st-st-st-st-st-st-stutter rap

Neighbours
Well interviewers turn away
Who wants to be covered with spray?
Talkin' to me for more than an hour
Is equivalent to an April shower
It's tough! Tough! Tougher than tough!
It's worse than Benny Hill and that's bad enough!
Something must be wrong with your vocal technique
When the twelve inch mix goes on for a week

I was rappin' in my club the other night
When nothin' I said was comin' out right
The crowd got angry, and this one man
He was gonna throw a bottle
He was gonna chuck a can, chuck a can, chuck it, chuck it, chuck it,
chuck it

Well no-one's ever seen what I mean
From the age of n-n-n-n-n-n-thirteen
We've all been caught in a m-m-mouth trap
So join with us and do the st-st-st-st-st-st-st-stutter rap

N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-N-NO, NEED, FOR SHOUTING!
W-w-w-w-why's that then?
Well, you'll wake Mr Whittaker at number thirty-two
Besides, it's not very good for the voice
(An amplifier or similar shorts out)

Uuhhh!

That's a bit harsh isn't it?
NO, SLEEP, 'TIL BEDTIME!
Talking of which it's ten-thirty already!
Is it? Ooooh!
What time do they stay up 'til in America?
(I mean)

Oh, very late. Sometimes quarter to eleven
(Ahhhh)
Well actually I've heard in New York they sometimes even stay up 'til midnight
No! No wonder they do all that shouting
(I mean)
Yes, they must be very snappy and irritable
That's right
(Ahhhh)

Do you know, I heard a story that those Toastie Boys stayed up 'til quarter past twelve!
Really? Well that's just silly!
They're just gonna get burnt out
Burnt out!

Well no-one's ever seen what I mean
From the age of n-n-n-n-n-n-thirteen
We've all been caught in a m-m-mouth trap
So join with us and do the st-st-st-st-st-st-st-stutter rap

Well no-one's ever seen what I mean
From the age of n-n-n-n-n-n-thirteen
We've all been caught in a m-m-mouth trap
So join with us and do the st-st-st-st-st-st-st-stutter rap

Well no-one's ever seen what I mean
From the age of n-n-n-n-n-n-thirteen
(Fades out)