Happy Again

I was young and you were there and I felt chosen
In a way, I liked the way you cut me open
Don't know how I didn't see that you had all the power
To chew me up and spit me out, guess in the moment
I put you on a pedestal, I made you golden
Would've spent my whole life throwing rocks up at your tower

It was bad, but it felt good

I was smilin', you were bleedin' me dry
I was flyin', fallin' out of your sky
I swore I never wanted it to end
I was dyin' tryna give you my love
Didn't see the damage till it was done
If happy's what I was back then
I hope I'm never happy again

I've been tryna break it down and analyze it
Swallow all the pain you left, metabolize it
Like I could make you go away if I could understand why, why I
Thought you were different and I found something I was missing
Guess I didn't, oh
And the worst part is I know you know

I was smilin', you were bleedin' me dry
I was flyin', fallin' out of your sky
I swore I never wanted it to end
I was dyin' tryna give you my love
Didn't see the damage till it was done
If happy's what I was back then
I hope I'm never happy again

Happy again
Mm, mm

I was smilin', but I wanted to cry
Felt like flyin', I thought I was so high
I swore that we were never gonna end, oh
I was dyin' tryna give you my love
Didn't see the damage till it was done
If happy's what I was back then
I hope I'm never happy again