physician, heal thyself!

So high I don't feel nothing
Smoking my whole life away, my lungs barely pumping
Aches throughout my body, I can barely keep it running
So much weighing on my mind, can barely lift my head up
Too scared if I fall this time I won't be able to get up

I been dying to feel good, living with this pain
Chemicals in my veins, just enough to keep me sane
What's there left for me to gain?
Tell me when it all changed? Nothing is the same

Conflicted by the stranger taking up my mirror
Heart of an angel, body of a sinner
They say more money more problems, no wonder I'm sicker
Safety off the trigger
Like should I end it?

So many nights was tempted, scarred with blisters on my hand
Ain't no point in talking about it, you wouldn't understand
Went from living it day by day to living it gram by gram
Loved ones looking me in the face, don't recognize who I am

Popping on pills, with this kinda pain, you think I care what's in it?
It's like I'm into the paranormal the way I ghost these bitches
They all leave me broke thinking that they gone do some fixing
All the roads that lead to me surrounded by burning bridges

Real good at bad decisions
Flexing in bad conditions
Popping on percs even when I see blurred, they still ain't got half my vision

Pulling up staff I'm dripping
Don't ever ask what I'm sipping
Can't trust no hoe, did that before and all of my cash went missing

Take me anywhere just don't take me home
This house became a place where I don't belong
Don't know if this the top, but I'm all alone
Hope I'm dead by dawn