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Hermaphrodite

Stephen Lynch

She's part girl,
she's part boy.
She's got parts everyone can enjoy.

She's got more,
she's got less.
She's got her manhood tucked in her dress.

Is she a mister,
or is she a miss?
Does she stand up when she's taking a piss?
She's my little girl,
yea, she's my little guy.
When I try to please I get poked in the eye.

She wears lace and she wears flannel.
She watches football and the Lifetime Channel.

What's that bulge under her nightie?
It must be hermaphrodite.

Somethings are white,
somethings are black.
Some girls wear make-up,
mine shaves her back.

She is still beautiful,
she is still fine.
It's too bad her package is bigger than mine.

She can't help her imperfections,
she gets jock itch from her yeast infections.
Who stole all my tightie whities?
It must be hermaphrodite.

Yea, hermaphrodite.


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