So Close

I'm standing on the ledge of this
I've been weighing the pros and the cons
I'm about to cut the ropes
Tell me you're waiting from below
I'm hesitant to write this down
Been unsure of where I stand
Avoidance is my middle name
But I'd like to pretend now

What if I never change?
And you were meant to be here
Not driving through the rain
The cigarette burns cold on the ground
Now you're so long gone
Nowhere to be found
And I stand by but you'll never come
I never showed you
Didn't want to jump the gun
I was so close to falling in love
I was so close
I was so close

Petals falling from the vase
A couple weeks now I thought you'd call
Too many months in the friend zone
But I swear I wanted to love you
Taking down the plans I had in mind
Erasing things you never said
You tell me: I can't fix this
But I wanted it anyway

What if I never change?
And you were meant to be here
Not driving through the rain
The cigarette burns cold on the ground
Now you're so long gone
Nowhere to be found
And I stand by but you'll never come
I never showed you
Didn't want to jump the gun
I was so close to falling in love
I was so close
I was so close

I see your face in the crowd you're at my show
But I know it isn't you
Oh I know it isn't you
I hear your name in conversation sometimes
But I hope it isn't you
Oh I hope it isn't you
Cause it tears at my throat not to scream it out loud

What if I never change?
And you were meant to be here
Not driving through the rain
The cigarette burns cold on the ground
Now you're so long gone
Nowhere to be found
And I stand by but you'll never come
I never showed you
Didn't want to jump the gun
I was so close to falling in love
I was so close
I was so close