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Bed Rope Crazy

Bob Schneider

She shines in tiger whites and lily beats
Her strange desires' close to sweet
The anxious knots inside her pleats
Have gridlocked all her patterned streets

So snuff the flame and fan the fire
You just can't get much any higher
Burn and run and never tire
Jesus was a goddamned liar

You've got cows and I've got deer
Burn the bridge and bring the beer
You're on top I'm in the rear
What we've got is hard and clear

Let's go walking on the lakes
Just hit the floor and fuck the brakes
Everybody raise your stakes
No ones getting angel cakes

You've been scared to be the boss
You'll never get your applesauce
All you've got is all you've lost
Spare the kid and cut the cost

You've been out in ankletights
You've been fishing for your rights
You've been losing all your kites
You've been smashing all your nights

While we've been having all the fun
In the Californian sun
I wish I had my loaded gun
I'm out of breath I've got to run

Cause what you're saying's anchor heavy
And what you are is extra chevy
So chase the flagpole round your days
I'm lazy lazy bed rope crazy

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