Sooner Than Later

All dressed up and nowhere to go
I’m headed to hell in a pair of
Gasoline drawers

Well I don’t know what I’ve been told
But I’ll tell you something that I wish I’d known
They’re only words, unless they’re true
And I should never have lied to you
So please tell me what you would say
When the IRS finds your tax haven
On the shores of the Seychelles
Or somewhere nice like Curaçao
I never should have bought me a boat
Now I’m up the damned crick without propulsion
I ain’t no wolf of any corporate elite
But now the walls are crumbling down around me
So if I say “I’m sorry” for involving you
Will that propel you to pay my bailout
Sooner than later?

I’d atone for all my sins
If I wasn’t already so far into the red
I know I said Fools Rush In
But it’s also foolish to keep lying
So tell me how should I say I’m sorry
I swear by this time next year
We’re gonna have more money, I hope
Where I pay off all my credit cards
And we’ll have a house with a big front yard
As I build up my own self-worth
And I promise I’ll stop being such a jerk
I just need you to keep me in check
And we’ll be straight cash, if you pay my bail
On time!

I know it’s rich when this is coming from
But right now, I need you to believe it
If you don’t pay, they’re going to send me away
Guaranteeing that you won’t see me
Sooner than later