The Secret

Have you not seen how I hold on tight
Did you forget that I feel your blame forevermore
Did you give up now for nothing
I feel so fragile, so numb inside
My heart is sore

Why has the poison taken hold of me
It is no secret, the noise in me will never die
There is no antidote, I have no cure
My light has withered
I say no more
I can not stay

The door is locked, I'm sure
My hands are clean
My keys are on me
I check again

I'm always tired
I never want to sleep
My dreams bedevil me
My breath is never deep

I am my best friend
I am my biggest enemy
That is who I am
That is nothing I can change

I force myself to speak
Feel insecure
Too scared of people
In awkward silence

I feel so paralyzed
But still I speak
I'm disembodied
I need to run away