Second Long Look

when we were lost,
we were saving every texture
taking breaths in every silk ray
candlelit nights blurred by dreams i never knew
and the land you crossed in my mind
pointed fingers straight through the back
of my heart
my hardened shell was your only defense,
you swore
"i looked up once and i was enveloped..."
these paths i can't even spell
and i know i used to feel you,
and i know the things you used to say
and all the time
we'd spent
pennies in pools as deep as oceans
and hands in hands as warm as now.
and it seems so unreal,
you're not in these memories.