Homesick Blues

I'm so homesick
And I'm three thousand miles from Times Square
I hate cafe au lait
This whole town is tres louse
I'm Place Vendome-sick
Fall asleep at the Folies Bergere
It's all a lot of chichi
I burp when I drink Vichy
Here's to Tin Pan Alley
A Yankee Rally
A show like "Sally,"
And notwithstanding Rand McNally
There's only one Broadway
On the map of the U.S.A.
Let's tell the gang we're coming
Back to old-fashioned kisses and modern plumbing
I've got those I'm-so-homesick blues

I miss Marilyn Miller in "Sunny,"
Jolson down on one knee
Mary Garden and Gatti-Casazza
Lovely evenings at the Plaza
Watching a fighter like Dundy
Cheering for May Bundy
Nora Bayes in a bill at the Palace
Teddy Roosevelt's daughter Alice
Theda Bara
Fiske O'Hara
Palais Royal
Standard Oil
Man O' War
Barrymore
Fritzi Scheff
Mutt and Jeff
Belmont Track
Cracker Jack
We've stayed away too long
From gals like Sophie Tucker
Texas Diamond won't be wrong
With that greeting: "Hello, sucker!"

Here's to Valentino
The Park Casino
The big Bambino
The cigarettes called Melachrino
Give me that old mainstem
And a song by the great George M
I feel my heart beat faster
Anywhere in the neighborhood of the Astor
I've got those I'm-so-homesick blues