Flightless Home

I once chased foreign lands
Like they held my missing face
Wished for colors, sounds
A new self in every place

But no border could fix
What my mirror couldn't hold
Each country a plaster
On a crack I never told

I called it freedom
But it was noise
A silence I packed
In a different voice

And I fly
Not to go
But to leave
What stays behind
Hoping the air
Might one day land
Into a home
I can find inside

My body holds a passport
But no proof of place
I sleep in rooms
That never learn my name

I’ve lived in seasons
That didn’t belong to me
Wore warmth like costume
Chased Sun like it could see

I called it freedom
But it was noise
A silence I packed
In a different voice

And I fly
Not to go
But to leave
What stays behind
Hoping the air
Might one day land
Into a home
I can find inside

If I ever return
Let it not be to a street
But to a skin
Where I can finally breathe

Still I fly
Not to go
But to meet
What I forgot to be
May the next cloud
Carry a key
To the room inside
That still waits for me