Carnival

I wish I was a couple years older
Couple years wiser
Just so I could know your heart
But I know that it would still confuse me anyway

I felt just a few degrees colder
Ever since the day you left
Spare my soul
Now I can still feel the pieces of my youth just stripped away

What is life but a merry-go-round
Just circling doubts living up in my head
I know that they want me dead

Keep me up when I try to stay down
I try to forget all the things they said
But they won't let me go

I try to fall asleep
But they won't let me dream
I just hope someday we'll come to terms

I'm falling underneath
And I try so hard to breathe
As this roller coaster kills me

So this goes out to the mind games in my head
You raise hell every night inside of my bed
I don't know where you came from
But I won't play your carnival no more

I wish I was just a little stronger
So they couldn't beat me up
But they did
Now I can still feel the mulch that they kicked at me pierce my hope

So I dusted off my shoulders and then
Told myself that I could prove it to them
Just trying to justify the first taste of feeling low

I try to fall asleep
But they won't let me dream
I just hope someday we'll come to terms

'Cause I'm falling underneath
And I try so hard to breathe
As this roller coaster kills me

So this goes out to the mind games in my head
You raise hell every night inside of my bed
I don't know where you came from
But I won't play your carnival no more