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I'm Still Trying

Matthew Fowler

My mind it sings of the memories
How they tug and cling
I lay listening
I could touch my past
Feel the heavy air
Hear the branches scratch
I lay looking back

I remember when I used to drive right over
I remember when you used to pull me closer
I was traded for a cigarette
In a bed you shared with an older friend
I remember all the years I yearned for closure

I'm still trying
And I wish I knew
Why I barely call
Why I'm short with you
I shut my eyes and kid you grew

So I've learned with time
All the bonds you build either live or die
And I've come to carve away my pride
'Cause I remember when you used to call me brother
I remember when you used to climb on my shoulders

We would lay out in the Sun to dry
Have a heart to heart from time to time
I remember all the grief we gave our mother

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