Reciever

I'm not home.
This is not my home.
Don't call me on the phone.
I can't even pick up the receiver.
It's way too heavy for me.
This is not me.
This is not who I want to be.
Your message was recorded, but the meaning not receieved.
You advise me to sit still and take it.
Thanks a lot.
What else can I do? This is history.
This is repetition.
And it's crushing me.
I can feel it, but I can't say it in front of the kids.
It's way too fucking big.
It weighs down my eyelids.
I never thought we'd make the same mistakes our parents made.