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Rappin' Rodney

Rodney Dangerfield

I tell ya i'm alright now
But last week i was in rough shape
But i don't get a break with nuthin'

I played hide and seek when i was three
(no respect, no respect)
Why they couldn't even look for me
(no respect, no respect)
I was an ugly kid i never had fun
(no respect, no respect)
They put me through a dog showand i won!
(no respect, no respect)
When i was born i brought no joy
(no respect, no respect)
My old man said he wanted a boy
(no respect, no respect)
I was an ugly kid always alone
(no respect, no respect)
Halloween i had to trick or treat over the phone
(no respect, no respect)
Friends don't call
My phone don't ring
I don't get a break with anything!
(whatsamatta rodney?)
Ah death, where is my sting?!

Chorus:
It's just rappin' rodney
Ain't that your type
No, no
Rappin' rodney
Get out of sight
It's just
Rappin' rodney
Make no mistake
Or old
Rappin' rodney
Can't get a break!

I'm getting old it's hard to face
(no respect, no respect)
Well during sex i lose my place
(no respect, no respect)
Steak and sex my favorite pair
(no respect, no respect)
I have 'em both the same way...very rare
(no respect, no respect)
I know i'm old i could go any minute
(no respect, no respect)
I got a kidney shaped pool with a stone in it
(no respect, no respect)
Doctor vinnie boombah that's another one
(no respect, no respect)
I said i wanted to stop aging he gave me a gun
(no respect, no respect)
I told him i got water on the knee
He gave me a sponge and raised his fee
(whatsamatter rodney?)
Ahhhh, it ain't easy bein' me

(chorus)

Ah, give me a break
Play somethin' from the forties

Now what kind of music is this?
And how 'bout stardust?

Hey what are you doin'?
That's not stardust!

Listen to this will ya?!
I mean where are the flutes?

What a band...
Hey, don't quit your day jobs!

Look at this!
The drummer carries the melody

Hey tell the bass player
I like his instrument

Hey boys, keep it goin'
Lay it on me
I'm in the groove!

Nothin' goes right i just can't fight it
(no respect, no respect)
Well eastern airlines thanked me for flying united
(no respect, no respect)
I got some money what did i do?
(no respect, no respect)
I bought some quicksand the deal fell through
(no respect, no respect)
My car broke down i called triple a
(no respect, no respect)
They left the car and towed me away
(no respect, no respect)
I can't take it no more i'm getting too old
(no respect, no respect)
I called suicide prevention they put me on hold
(no respect, no respect)
Winter, summer, spring, and fall
I'm always up against the wall
(whatsamatta rodney?)
Ahhh, i don't get no respect at all

(chorus)

It's getting worse
It's caving in
The happiness i can't take it no more
It's all over
Hey, where are my kids?
Somebody help me
Hey bartender!
Hey! who's that guy with my daughter?
Where's my wallet?
How do i get out of here?
Stop that dancin'!

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