Can't Get Laid In The USA

A holiday of a lifetime
4 weeks in the USA
I'll meet some California girls
And with them I'll stay

So i wait, just off Haight
For that special one
Santa Clara, Sacramento and Modesto
But still i get no fun

And I've been-
Thinking and a wondering
Drinking and a stumbling
Should i go or should I stay
Can't get laid in the USA

They said- 'you can't lose down in Santa Cruz'
She'll soon be in my reach
But its illegal to dig for clams
Down on Pismo beach

A Latino with fire was my desire
While I was in L.A.
And Hollywood if she could
But not with me I'm afraid.

Well those west coast girls
Really knock me out
With their big behinds
Those west coast girls
Make me scream and shout
That booties always on my
m-m-m-m-m-m-mind.

The Hawaiian babes really made my stay
And the beaches were all great
The only lei I'd get was around my neck
And it cost $1.98.