The Scotsman

Well a scotsman clad in kilt left the bar one evening fair.
And could tell by how he walked that he'd drunk more than his share.
He fumbled 'round until he could no longer keep his feet
and he stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street

Chorus: Ring ding didde diddle i-de-oh, ring di diddley i-oh
He stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street.

About that time two young and lovely girls just happened by
And one says to the other with a twinkle in her eye
"See young sleeping Scotsman so strong and handsome built
I wonder if its true what they dont wear beneath the kilt!"

Chorus: Ring ding diddle diddle i-de-oh, ring di diddley i-oh
I wonder if its true what they dont wear beneath the kilt!

They crept up on that sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be
Lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see
and there behold for them to view
beneath his Scottish skirt was nothing more then God had graced him with upon his birth!

Chorus: Ring ding diddle diddle i-de-oh, ring di diddley i-oh
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth

They marveled for a moment, then one said we must gone
Lets leave a present for our friend before we move along!
As a gift they left a blue silk ribbon tied into a bow
Around the bunny star, the Scots kilt did lift them show

Chorus: Ring ding diddle diddle i-de-oh, ring di diddley i-oh
Around the bunny star, the Scots kilt did lift them show

Now the Scotsman woke to nature's call and stumbled towards a tree
Behind the bush he lifts his kilt and gawks at what he sees!
And in a startled voice he says to whats before his eyes
"(grunt) Lad i donno where ya been but I see ya won first prize!"

Chorus: Ring ding diddle diddle i-de-oh, ring di diddlye i-oh
Ah lad i dunno where ya been but I see ya won first priz!