What a Year It’s Been

What a year it's been, a lot of ups and downs
Keep fallin' off the wagon, but never hit the ground
Or should I say the bottom? That's a place I'll never go
Was drinkin' hella heavy, had no self-control
Started doubtin' myself, had no motivation
Liquor and depression is a bad combination
Ain't doin' enough, just doin' the most
Tasted some success, then I put that shit in coast
Never comin' around, my ass was always ghost
Not realizin' I hurt the ones I loved the most
Refuse to fuck this up when our dream is too close
Had to grow up and put my pride behind
Got out of my funk, and now I feel alive
Writin' verses with a smile while my daughter's by my side, like
Look mama, I made that
Look mama, I made that
The boy is a star, soon enough you can say that

The boy came too far for me to just pick up and lay back
Since way, way, way back, I been on playback
And P be blendin' shit like Beethoven and Ajax
Since Ye met A-Trak, Rozay got his first Maybach
Been told that I been chasin' a dream, even with paychecks
Even if my rent's paid for, even if I pay state tax
Even if it took me all across the world and way, way back
Grandpa call it chasin' a dream and I can't take that

Ah, ah-ah-ah, ah-ah-ah
Yeah, yeah
(When you needed my mind, but my pride took over)

Check it, yo, check it
With 48 percent, tryna make tragedy turn triumph
But everybody tryna make family turn client
How many shares you own on my dreams?
Enough money can make any gathering turn riot
Weekends full of distant daps and head nods
Acknowledgin' niggas who really just binge awe
Pshh, who, me? Nigga, I been calm
I just sense when a nigga think I'ma be his pawn
Yo, I heard a lot of bullshit within this last year
All chirp, that shit's for the birds
If you ask here it's been a fast year, I hear they only get faster
With more chatter, yo, but that shit don't matter, wassup?
How far across you wanna go to go up faster?
Is hard work worth it, or gettin' it all that matters?
Yo, it's like the difference between stairs and a ladder
I'm for the latter, spellin' don't change so many factors, wassup?
You Mr. Me Too's, I'm Mister Miyagi
I fathered these niggas, this shit is a hobby
No honor in some shit if niggas just copy, false valor-ass niggas
You didn't earn them stripes, you David Clarke-ass nigga
Fuck you, nigga

(Starts fucking up)
I was who you depended on
And I knew that you ran and called
I was too cool to get involved
If I was you I'd abandon all of me
I mean, honestly, I was down and lone
I mean obviously, I was down to roll
I just honestly needed time to grow
And you needed my mind, but my pride took over