Then I'll Be Smiling

Trailed by a mess
Of masking tape construction paper
And the best of intentions
He tried to patch up every hole as he went
Back and forth and back again
And his friends half full of half concerns
Embarrassed looks and tired words
They burrowed deeper into the ignorant
Little lives they preferred
And he envied their distance
Their lack of concern
He thought,
Once I shed the whole of me
Once I shed the whole of me
Then I'll be smiling

He cursed himself
And his instinct to nurse
Every idea to health
And all of the falls that he'd spent
Trying to coax his name from the mouths
Of success
He thought
Once I shed the whole of me
Once I shed the whole of me
Then I'll be smiling.

They litter me with small awareness'
Then they ask if I'm good enough
They litter me with small awareness'
Just to wake me up
Why do the fools wake me up?