A thousand artists have done their damnest to paint her
But all in vain
And ev'ry day their hopes grow fainter
The reason's plain
For Victoria's also known as victor
Making tricky to depict her
Victor Victoria, Victor Victoria
Victoria, what a victor you are

She spreads confusion
Her illusion is serene
Behind the screen
Is he a king or is she a queen
She's such a tease
Fellers like these
Trying to please
Get ill at ease
Not sure if he's Louee or Louise

No wonder thousands of lovers struggle
(No wonder male friends)
To win her without success
(Also female keep sending)
Even an evening having dinner
(me mail wondring)
She won't say yes
(Can she be male)
And God help the guy whoever tricked her
(They all pursue her)
Kiss 'em good bye if they afflict her
(And woo her and miscounstrue her)

Victor Victoria, Victor Victoria
Victoria, what a victor you are

Men are so dim fancying and fancying her
They're so bemused
They get confused which one they prefer

Is he a she Is he a she
Is she a he Is she a he
If you ask me If you ask me

It's hard to see
Which can she be

(Victoria)
There's no guarantee
And so when young men and old men turn into bold men
To hold my hand
They get too frazzled and bedazled to understand

You can't contradict her or predict him
She is the victor, not the victim

Victor Victoria, Victor Victoria

And that's why...

Young men and old men turn into bold men
(All men, healthy tall)
To hold her hand
(men, and wealthy)
They get too frazzled and bedazzled
(small men, with the)
To understand gall of all men
You can't contradict her or predict him
(mob and molest her)
She is the victor, not the victim
(They all do their best to pester)


Victor Victoria, Victor Victoria
Victoria, what a victor you are

(King)
So when a guy loves a lady
However shady it may appear

(Toddy)
No need to yell if they're two fellers
That's not so queer

(Victoria, Toddy)
We're all meant to cherish one another

(Squash)
It's not a crime to love each other

(Toddy)
He sings too

Victor Victoria, Victor Victoria
Victoria, what a victor you are
Victoria, what a victor you are

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